That guy

Is nothing sacred!

I’ve figured out what the fuck my problem is… All to do now is defeat it before it kills me.

Guess my paranoia was justified. Am being spoken about, judged, ridiculed. Lied to openly. First and second hand. Why the Hell would you even tell me that. It’s an intentional way to try to hurt.me.no matter how you try to disguise it. I’ve got the ability to hurt, yet only do it to the undeserving. Don’t know what’s right anymore. Whats up and down, shaking and crying, wanting to hurt myself. And thoughts to stop. I wish I could just pause.time and spend days contemplating, rationalize situations. Make proper decisions. I still can’t believe you’d say that to me. Yeah I’m a hypocrite and I hate myself for it. The person I’m trying to be hates me for regressing and resorting to falling apart like this again. I needs to stop. Argh.

Can’t believe someone can have such double standards be be a hypocrite ….